Never listen to your drunk friends. Ever.

I am aware of the fact that I haven’t posted in a month. Every computer in my house has simultaneously broken down. I can’t make this shit up, y’all.

Last weekend I broke up with my boyfriend. It was the end of a teenage relationship, that’s it.

However, before I did so, I was given advice by my friends on the best way to do it. Drunken advice.

There was: “Make out with a girl and send him a photo.”

“Call him Alex repeatedly until he thinks you’re cheating on him.”

“Scream ‘If you don’t love horses you can’t love me!’ at him.”

I think one of the best ones has to be one that was used by my friend…while she was sober: “It’s not me, it’s you.”

Needless to say, I did not use any of these suggestions.

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